Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Deer in Headlights

Nothing says "competent leadership" like having your press secretary stare blankly into the eyes of a journalist.

Don't get me wrong, Scott McClellan's doe-like eyes and dough-like body are enough to melt anyone's heart. But when he looks at you like a child who was asked to solve a quadratic equation, you have to feel sorry for him.

He recently said that he unknowingly passed on false information back when he was press secretary.

"So I stood at the White house briefing room podium in front of the glare of the klieg lights for the better part of two weeks and publicly exonerated two of the senior-most aides in the White House: Karl Rove and Scooter Libby.

There was one problem. It was not true.

I had unknowingly passed along false information. And five of the highest ranking officials in the administration were involved in my doing so: Rove, Libby, the vice President, the President's chief of staff, and the president himself."

Get outta here. I don't believe you. You're in politics and you had to lie? My world has been rocked to the core.

I would really like to know what the hell goes on in Bush's office. I'd imagine that it must be like an Aerosmith recording session in the 70s. Mounds of cocaine everywhere, Condi Rice passed out in her underwear, Karl Rove banging at the door, needing another fix, all the while Cheney and Richard Pearle do inhuman lines of coke and bounce ideas off each other while saying "dude" a lot.

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